How the Bottle Saved My Breastfeeding Relationship

When our daughter was born I had a goal of breastfeeding for 6 months. I really wasn’t sure what to expect or how our breastfeeding relationship would go. Around 6 months I decided I wanted to keep going because I enjoyed it, my daughter was thriving and I didn’t really like the alternatives available. However, shortly after I became discouraged and I wanted to quit. My daughter never took a bottle. No matter what we did or what bottle we used she refused. Trust me we tried almost everything! Read more about my love/hate relationship with nursing my daughter.

Looking back I’m glad I nursed her until she was 13 months old, but in the midst I was discouraged and frustrated. If I’m being honest I didn’t ALWAYS want to be the one who had to feed her. I felt like I could never leave her for longer than a few hours. I felt worn out.

Now that our son is here I ideally want to nurse him until he is a year old as well. This time around I’ve faced some challenges, but I’ve also enjoyed it so much more! See the bottle saved my breastfeeding relationship. I wish I could tell you exactly what the difference is this time around, but there are too many factors. My son doesn’t seem as picky as my daughter and he will take a bottle easily.

How The Bottle Saved My Breastfeeding Relationship. One mother's nursing journey and experiences in motherhood. Heart of Deborah

One noticeable difference is our consistency with the bottle. We give him a bottle more frequently than we gave it to our daughter. My husband is no longer in residency and working 80+ hours a week so he is around more often to give IJ a bottle. We started the bottle when IJ was about 3 weeks old and he gets it about 2 times a week.

I really didn’t think his ability to take a bottle would make a big difference in my parenting, but it truly does! I feel so refreshed getting a break every so often. I also don’t worry as much when I am leaving him and we are able to go out on more date nights. Now mama you may be thinking, but my child hates the bottle what am I to do? If you try everything and nothing seems to work you may just need to wait this season of life out. Looking back that year went by so quickly with my daughter. At points it seemed like forever and as if she would never wean, but it happened. She went straight to using a straw cup and I am actually grateful for the year of breastfeeding. I may not have lasted that long if it weren’t for her bottle stubbornness. 

Another valuable lesson I learned through breastfeeding is that it will get better.

How The Bottle Saved My Breastfeeding Relationship. One mother's nursing journey and experiences in motherhood. Heart of Deborah

I really think this is important for new moms to understand. Our culture makes breastfeeding seem “natural” and “easy,” but that is not always the case. There were times with both of our kids where I thought “I can’t do this anymore. I want to stop.” This happened in the beginning and in the middle of our breastfeeding journey. Even when you think you get the hang of it all, something can happen and throw off your routine.

If you are a better mom by stopping, then by all means stop and don’t feel guilty about it! But if you can hang on just a little bit longer, it may get better. Don’t be afraid to reach out to other moms, your doctor or a lactation consultant. My support system throughout this journey has been key. My husband has a very calm personality and this helps me when I have my dramatic freak out moments.

How has your breastfeeding relationship gone?

I’d love to hear from you in the comments below!

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  1. Exactly what I needed to read today. We’ve had a rocky start, with latching issues and milk transfer issues leading me to have some supply issues. So I’ve been pumping to give to my little girl, and I’ve said many times I don’t think I can keep it up – 2-3 hours a day pumping in addition to feeding it back to her, taking care of her in other ways, and trying to sleep, and being discouraged that we’ve still had to supplement with some formula because of weight loss. But we’ve made progress (albeit slow) with the lactation consultant, and more importantly my attitude is better as I’ve decided that this is the first aspect of mothering that I have to consciously choose to do for the glory of God, to make His Name famous, even if the only ones who see and see it are my husband and daughter.

    1. You are doing a great job mama! No one tells you how hard breastfeeding is! It’s a beautiful thing and yet it takes work. Somedays it’s still difficult for us and we’ve been doing it for almost 7 months now. Thankfully success as a mother is not related to our breastfeeding success or struggle. Hang in there.

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